May 4, 2006
What Is Inner Peace And
What Keeps Us From Having It?
by Ralph Hubbard
In some ways inner peace is in the eyes of the beholder.
You know it when you have it. People describe it in
numerous ways. One person said they have inner peace when
they are fully confident in their own lovability. Another
said they believe inner peace is achieved when they are living
in a state of gratitude for everything life has offered them.
Another definition might be those rare moments when we let go of
all anger, are not being resentful of others or judging them or
holding that we are somehow better than another person or group.
Another might say they have inner peace when the inner
commentary or chatter going on in our head, with all its
accusations and demands, slows to a crawl. Inner peace is any
and all of these thoughts. However you define it, you will
know when you are at peace.
All this is making the assumption that at some time in your
life you have been at peace within yourself. Perhaps you
never have. At Living in Peace our belief is that when
people have their own inner peace they are also at peace with
their world. We would like to help make those moments of
inner peace not be so rare. We would like to see inner
peace become the rule rather than the exception in most people’s
If you asked most people if they would like more inner peace,
they will probably say," Sure I would like to have more inner
peace”. So what keeps us from having more inner peace
and all the benefits that go along with it? One of the major
contributors to our lack of inner peace is when we are resentful
and angry with anyone or anything. It is our resentment
and anger that helps to rob us of our inner peace and joy.
We might be able to rationalize our anger and resentment and
perhaps get a lot of people in agreement about why we are that
way, but we all know how we feel when we are angry and resentful, and its not
Resentment is probably the single most insidious force in our
world. It brings about enormous personal suffering,
although we often don't see it at the time, and many believe it
gives us justification to do almost anything to those we are
resenting. It is at the very root of the most horrendous
atrocities that humankind has inflicted on other humans.
On a small scale some people believe resentment toward an
employer can give them permission to steal time or supplies or
worse, after all look at how badly they have treat you. Or
resentment toward a spouse can give you permission to cheat on
them. On a larger scale resentment toward another ethnic
or religious group appears to give permission for discrimination
or even genocide. I doubt that many people reading this
have participated in genocide, but I'll bet you can think of
some small thing your own resentment has "allowed" you to do.
Why would anyone want to hang onto a resentment when it seems
to cause so much suffering? Think about some little
resentment you have held on someone. The juicy little
secret is that we believe we get something for holding the
resentment. At the very least, we believe we get to be
better than the other person or group and it seems to make it
O.K. for us to act anyway we want or do anything we want towards
them. We believe we are justified in our actions or
thoughts. Anytime I feel down, all I have to do is drag
out some old resentment toward someone and I instantly get to be
better than them. With a “prize” like that it is no wonder
so many people harbor resentments for so many years. Try
listing some of your resentments and count how long you have
held them. It will probably surprise you how the years add
The problem is that the “prize” is an illusion, it’s not real
and the number of years you have held the resentments is how
long you have had to suffer a loss to your inner peace.
We don’t really get to be better than those we resent. We
don’t really get permission to treat them in any despicable way
we want. If we really tell the truth to ourselves, holding
our resentment doesn’t hurt the other person it only hurts us.
There is a huge cost to our holding onto resentments and at the
very least, it cost us our inner peace. There is almost no
area in our lives that resentment doesn’t cost us.
If people got the huge cost to themselves and our world for
holding resentment, they would run to the nearest church,
counselor, coach, or personal growth training facility and beg
to learn how to let go of their resentments if they didn’t
already know how.
Letting go of resentments is not the only path to inner
peace, but it is a great start. Look for further
discussions on this and other ways to gain inner peace in
future newsletters. The newsletters are a way Living in
Peace can do its part to help people have more inner peace and
become a link in the chain of world peace.
Ralph Hubbard has been on a path of self
discovery, enlightenment, and personal growth most of his
life. The last 20+ years he has learned much through the
More To Life Kairos Foundation’s More To Life program.
) He has seen radical change in himself and
other people through this program and has seen many people
loose their anger, resentments, fears, prejudices, and intolerances
and become at peace with themselves and their world.
His desire to pass this knowledge on to others, so we can
have a more peaceful world, is what
prompted him to start the Living in Peace
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